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Wifey biked home from work at her usual time, in the heat of a late summer afternoon. The screen door creaked. “Hi Honey, I’m homo!”

Last week, I appeared at a “Savage Love Live” event at Radford University in Radford, Virginia. Questions are submitted on index cards at SLL events, which allows questioners to remain anonymous and forces them to be succinct. The crowd at Radford was large and inquisitive. The students submitted more questions than I could possibly hope to answer in two hours—and Radford students also managed to stump me. Twice.

Once again we are seeing more than a thousand homes lost to a hurricane in Louisiana. This time around, some wise investments in infrastructure saved New Orleans, but what happens to those outside the new levee systems who have lost their homes?

I was wondering what you think about the Folsom Street Fair, the annual gay leather/fetish/BDSM street fair in San Francisco. Do you think it is still a socially relevant display? Or do you think that in this time when we are fighting for civil rights and equality that it does more harm than good?

Better Displaying San Francisco

 

I’m in the locker room, drying off after my morning workout. A woman in my fitness class opens her locker across from mine. We’d bonded today during our exercise routine, exchanging eye rolls over classmates’ chitchat while we were trying to concentrate on our crunches.

Healthy straight male here. The problem is twofold: My girlfriend doesn’t like come in her mouth and she feels that doggy-style is objectifying to women. Therefore, we don’t do either. She says she wants to get more comfortable and try these things. But they never seem to happen — and when I bring them up, it turns into a touchy discussion. These are #1 and #2, respectively, on my list of favorite things to do in the bedroom, and I’m not okay with not doing them indefinitely. The sex is otherwise great, but I do think there’s a double standard at work here.

The cause of our current unpleasantness: deregulation followed by tax cuts. Romney’s formula for change: tax cuts followed by deregulation.

I want to buy my 14-year-old niece a dildo, some lube, and an age-appropriate book about sex. (Can you recommend one?) I have her mother’s permission, but I wanted to double-check on whether there are legal issues I should be concerned about. (I live in Oregon.) Do you think it would be inappropriate for me to cross that boundary with my niece?

September is a harvest month for Willamette Valley inhabitants. We are not having as good a time as we might wish because the lead-up has been slow. The long, cold spring followed by a cool, wet early summer has slowed tomatoes from ripening and reduced eggplant production. Even the zucchini are not growing into baseball bats as quickly as usual. Corn grew slowly until there was a burst of hot days, resulting in a sudden glut and the lowest prices in years.

The presidential candidates talk about taxes and budget cuts but they don’t clearly state the trade-off. That is the purpose of this article.

With the parking meter fee set to rise to $1.70 an hour in the university area, one bank plans to open a branch there just to make parking loans.

I have been in a long-term relationship with a wonderful woman who doesn’t have a lot of people she socializes with in her daily life. She is a Burning Man person and converses online with other “burners.” I confronted her when I realized she was discussing the ups and downs of our relationship in a public online forum. She still hung out on that forum, but her presence diminished. I assumed she was socializing in private e-mails. A few months later, I discovered that she was actually moderating a different forum.

Not sure that even you can help with this one, but I’ll give it a shot…

Walking down a long hallway of the Rayburn Building in Washington, D.C., a pair of tall, open double doors at the end framed by flags focused my attention. Just past the doors, a large desk made a stately picture. As I got closer, I saw it was my daughter, Kelsey, at the desk. She looked up and flashed a professional, somewhat intimidating smile before jumping up to greet me like a kid on recess.

I am a college-age gay male. Last year, I dated two guys. The first—let’s call him Mitt—I dated for five months. He broke up with me, and it hurt as much as breakups do, but I got over it. A few months later, I dated another guy—let’s call him Paul—for a month. I really liked him, but he broke up with me, too. Then I found out that two days after breaking up with me, Paul started going out with Mitt. They knew I had dated each of them. It was the end of the school year, and I quickly left for vacation.

Oregon's Department of Agriculture has made good on its determination to shrink the Willamette Valley Canola Control District, despite ongoing objections from Willamette Valley specialty seed growers, seed companies, clover growers and the Clover Commission, fresh market vegetable producers, organic growers, and Oregon Tilth, the state's largest certifier of organic crops.

Coach Chip Kelly had carefully planned his recent run with the bulls in the streets of Pamplona, Spain. But as soon as the running began, “... it was total anarchy,” said Kelly. “The game plan we were going to execute was out the window, and we were just running for our lives.”

I suspect that Paul Ryan will have a similar experience if he ever gets his extreme budget passed.

I’ve been confused about my sexuality for two years. I am a 22-year-old female. I liked guys when I was in school, but then, in perhaps the most stereotypical of fashions, I developed a HUGE crush on Tegan and Sara when I was nearly 20. I like the idea of being with women, but I have never had a major crush on anyone since. So I’m really confused over what my sexual orientation actually is. I know many hetero-identifying people experience same-sex crushes, but can someone’s whole sexual orientation just change overnight?

I can think of only two possible explanations for the blistering heat all around the globe this summer: Either the scientists are right when they say that human activity is causing climate change, or whoever has his hand on the world’s thermostat is really pissed. 

“So has Occupy Eugene dropped the ball on the homeless situation?” a friend asked me recently. Our summer issue of the Eugene Occupier had just come out, and I happened to have a stack with me. I handed him a copy and invited him to read the front-page article on Opportunity Village by Jean Stacey.

DEAR READERS: I’m on vacation for the next two weeks. This week’s column features three recent Savage Love Letters of the Day. (The SLLOTD goes out to folks who have the Savage Love app for iPhone and Android.) I hope everyone is having a great summer, and I’ll see you in two weeks. —Dan

 

 

I’m 16 and I like my friend’s mom who is 35. She’s married and has two kids. But I really like her. What should I do?

Help One Really Needy Youth

August is a month of uncertain excitement. This year is no exception; exciting because the many cold, rainy days that have preceded its arrival cause anticipation of its having the year’s second least average monthly rainfall.

I just read about rabid raccoons in the July 26 News Briefs and I have some personal opinions on this article. Many, many years ago, I worked as a microbiologist, assisting in the examination of suspected rabid animals that had bitten people. While doing so, I learned a lot about the disease of rabies and its ramifications.