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I am a 28-year-old gay man living in a major East Coast city. I recently connected with a guy on a vanilla dating website, and we are quickly developing a real interest in each other. After talking online for a bit, we exchanged numbers. Our first conversation was through text messages for the better part of six hours. The next night, we talked over the phone for an hour or two. And the third consecutive night was our first date.

I know you’re slammed with work, debt and episodes of Downton Abbey to catch up on. And I know you feel like an eco-hypocrite jetting to see Grandma and coral reefs before they disappear. Me, too. But if your political inaction on climate change stems mostly from not knowing how to make a difference, Bill McKibben just issued his Tarzan call for your help.

Millions of Americans have been educated to believe that their psychiatric drugs correct a known “biochemical imbalance,” but they might be surprised to find that this belief is not actually supported by science. In fact, the evidence that psych drugs correct “biochemical imbalances” is so weak that an editorial in Psychiatric Times recently claimed that it is only within “urban legend” that well-informed psychiatrists have ever believed such theories.

The revelations of the past month and a half have shone light on system of suspicionless global and domestic surveillance so pervasive that George Orwell would have been stunned. The goal of the NSA is that all electronic communication whatsoever will be stored and analyzed. If “red flags” are raised in the analysis, or if suspicion is raised for other reasons, then a closer look may be had.

Stand-your-ground laws say that if  a person is confronted by danger he has no duty to retreat, though good sense may advise that he do so. Or, he can play John Wayne and the law will have his back. Such laws entitle A to kill B if he “reasonably believes “ that killing B is “necessary” to save his own life. Such laws speak with forked tongue. For how can A reasonably believe it was necessary to kill B if A could have avoided such a necessity by jumping on his horse and riding off? It only makes sense if your mind lives in Dodge City.

I’ve been mostly happily married for 15 years. I’m a straight man. I love my wife. We used to have a great sex life. But after many years, children, and just day-to-day reality, our sex life is now pretty unsatisfying. While my wife was barely GGG at the beginning, now she will not go down on me ever. We do have sex 4 to 10 times a month, but it is always plain vanilla. I went on Craigslist to look at the “casual encounters” ads, and after months of just looking, I replied to some. My only actual response admitted to being a man pretending to be a woman.

I am a young gay man who has been so freaked out by the idea of catching an STI that I haven’t gotten with anyone for two years. But last night, I hooked up with a cute 21-year-old FTM trans boy, and maybe because it was a person with lady parts, I let caution go, and no condom was used. How worried should I be about having made a baby with a person who is way too young to have one?

Cautious Homo In Loopy Dilemma

P.S. He is on hormone therapy.

 

My friend and former Congressman Jim Weaver, who lives on Seavey Loop Road, called me about a month ago asking what might be done, if anything, about the summer events in Buford Park that seemed to be multiplying exponentially. He told me about an event last year that backed up traffic from the park to I-5 and kept him from getting out of his driveway.

The air was calm, the birdsong brisk, as sunlight slanted through the canopy, spotlighting the Wiley Griffon Historical Monument in the Eugene Masonic Cemetery. It may have been a trick of the light, but Wiley’s bronze eye sparkled. The Preacher and I stood looking out into the forest, overlooking the gravesite on the 50th anniversary of the assassination of Medgar Evers, June 12.

The plan to add bike lanes to South Willamette Street asks bicyclists to entrust their lives to a paint strip on the pavement.

I’m a 26-year-old straight female. I’m writing because I need to ask someone what to think right now. I just fucked a guy while on holiday in Costa Rica. I thought I was sex-positive and adventurous, so why do I feel so ashamed? I’m dating a boy back in the US who I absolutely adore, but we’re not necessarily exclusive. The guy was a 22-year-old local — I thought he was so sweet. But he did that bullshit “fuck her and then get her out of bed and drive her home” shit. I told him it wasn’t okay, and he made excuses.

f you wanted to carve a dugout canoe from a log, is it better to chip out the inside first? Or should you first shape the outside and then scoop out the inside? The answer at the end may surprise you.

The politics of gun control today clearly indicate that at the federal or state level in Oregon, legislation to either enact new limitations or expand current regulations regarding firearm ownership is highly unlikely.

Since I was going to drive all the way to Tucson from Eugene for a weekend retreat, I decided that afterward, on Monday, I’d continue a couple of hours down U.S.-19 to the Mexican border town of Nogales, and stay until Saturday. A mini-immersion experience in life at the border.

Summertime! When clear skies and warm sun lure us to the edge of the river for a float, a swim, a picnic or maybe just a nap on a shady bank. In the old days it was not uncommon to find that the river’s edge had changed from the high waters of winter, with trees and banks shifted, gravel bars moved from one place to the next. But our rivers have been increasingly narrowed by the convenience and stability of roads and other hard surfaces. Still, there are home waters nearby where the river’s shifting compass still holds sway, and somewhere it is getting a chance to meander again.

The guy who came up with the new sizes for seat cushions used in Autzen Stadium must be the same fellow who designs seating for United Airlines.

I am a married 54-year-old postmenopausal woman. My libido has diminished significantly, and it takes me much longer to climax. My husband gets tired sooner and is unable to maintain an erection as long as he used to; this makes it even more difficult for me to climax. I have taken up an activity I did in my 20s when I was single: giving myself enemas. The enema-induced orgasms are fantastic. It’s not an obsessive habit. I’ll sometimes do it four times in one week and then go a month without one.

As a high school freshman Katelyn VanBerkel would carefully pick her way through the broken glass and muddied potholes of the trailer park in Glenwood, warily skirting a drunk prostitute, avoiding the local junkies until she could make it onto the warm and dry bus that would take her to the one place she felt safe, school.

Pope Francis has revealed that there is an active “gay lobby” at the Vatican. That might explain why a pope’s wardrobe includes red shoes and red velvet stoles trimmed with ermine. 

Homo headlines are popping. On the global scene, marriage equality now reigns in 14 countries. This spring New Zealand amended its Marriage Act, Brazil gave the green light to same-sex marriage, and France passed marriage equality, including equal adoption rights. The first to marry under France’s new law, Vincent and Bruno, exchanged vows and rings last week. Let’s hear it for liberté, égalité, fraternité! (Et sororité, for un peu more égalité.)

I’m a straight guy in my early 30s with an amazing girlfriend of two years. A few months ago, I felt open enough to share my taboo fantasy: father/daughter incest. My GF, to my delight, not only understands the fantasy but enjoys participating in it! Quickly: I have ZERO interest in this kind of thing actually happening. I understand the kind of damage that sexual abuse can do and has done to many, many women, and I would never pursue something like this in real life.

David Matthew Minor died five years ago this month in a bicycle-car collision at the corner of 13th and Willamette. His “ghost bike” memorial still stands in front of FedEx/Kinkos: the white bike that his mother Susan keeps surrounded by flowers, and the sign peeking out of the petunias “Start Seeing Everyone” reminding drivers to be aware of pedestrians and cyclists.

It’s reported that the UO police want to carry .45 cal. semi-automatic handguns with 13-round magazines to “respond quickly in emergencies and to solve crimes that are a high priority on campus, such as speeding and bicycle and laptop theft.” Is this wise? What if a speeder or bicycle thief has an assault rifle? Shouldn’t campus police be carrying AR-15s with 30-round magazines? And what if the partying at the new Capstone student complex spills into the street? Shouldn’t there be at least one Army surplus tank available? 

I’m a 27-year-old bisexual chick who just moved in with my girlfriend of 10 months. I love her very much, and this is a great relationship — hot sex, laughs, good conversation. Here’s the thing: I like to smoke pot, and pot makes her very uncomfortable. We’ve talked about it a lot — you know how dykes are — and I’ve been up front with her from the beginning. I’m responsible and successful, and I don’t smoke that often. But I don’t like feeling guilty. I’m afraid we’re reaching an impasse on this issue.