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I’m a reader in Kansas with two teenage daughters, 16 and 18. My girls recently met a boy where they work and both took an interest in him. The 18-year-old was devastated that he was more interested in her younger sister. I spoke to the 16-year-old about it, which is when I found out this boy is going to be a sophomore in college. The fact that he’s interested in a 16-year-old is a red flag. I asked the 16-year-old to keep her distance. She agreed, but I saw a shirtless photo he sent her.

Why write a column about economic development? Lots of people just yawn when they hear the term. But, as they say, write about what you know, and I do know economic development. I did it for a living. And, besides, I actually find it interesting.

I’m a 35-year-old straight woman, recently married, and everything is great. But I have been having problems reaching orgasm. When we first started dating, I had them all the time. It was only after we got engaged that it became an issue. He is not doing anything differently, and he works hard to give me oral pleasure, last longer, and include more foreplay. He’s sexy and attractive and has a great working penis. I am very aroused when we have sex, but I just can’t climax. It is weird because I used to very easily, and still can when I masturbate.

As the Oregon Legislature wound down last week, I called a good friend of 20-plus years, Bob Livingston, a lobbyist and president of the Oregon State Firefighters Council. While we were often at odds during the PERS (Public Employees Retirement System) reform fight in 2003, we’ve maintained a strong trusting relationship over the years. 

I’m a gay medical student with a medical fetish, and I can’t even open up to my therapist about this. I think the fetish started when I was young; I was once in the hospital and given a suppository for a fever. Then one time I was given a Fleet enema. I don’t think the “butt stuff” turned me gay, but my fetish may stem from the aspect of being controlled. I grew up in a very conservative religious household. I’ve never been in a relationship, and I don’t know that I could have one while hiding what turns me on.

For the first time in several years our reservoirs are full. This is good news all around because it means that there has been a good rain year with higher than average snowpack in the mountains. Euphemistically called “lakes” by the Army Corps of Engineers, I always add “reservoir” to the names, as in “Dexter Lake Reservoir.”  Reservoirs are not the same water bodies as natural lakes and have distinctive ecological relationships worth remembering. Reservoirs built for flood control in the Willamette River watershed are subject to dramatic changes in water level every year.

I know firsthand that running for political office costs money. As a candidate for House District 14 in West Eugene and Junction City, I made a lot of fundraising calls. I didn’t (and still don’t) mind raising money and I think I’m not too bad at it. Every candidate needs resources to explain to voters about why they’re running to serve and what ideas they have for fixing the biggest problems facing your community. 

I’m a 29-year-old straight woman facing a dilemma. I dated this guy about a year ago, and in many ways he was exactly the guy I was looking for. The main hitch was sexual. Our sex was good, but he had a fetish where he wanted me to sleep with other guys. Basically, he gets off on a girl being a “slut.” He was also into threesomes or swapping with another couple. I experimented with all of that for a few months, and in a way I had fun with it, but I finally realized that this lifestyle is not for me. I want a more traditional, monogamous relationship. I broke it off with him.

Everyone in Oregon has a favorite Uncle Phil. Certainly Phil Knight fills that roll for many Duck fans. But even though I was once Senator Duck with the University of Oregon in my district, I’ve always had an uneasy relationship with that Uncle Phil.

I had a great time at the live taping of the Savage Lovecast at Chicago’s Music Box Theatre. Audience members submitted questions on cards, and I tackled as many questions as I could over two hours—with the welcome and hilarious assistance of comedian Kristen Toomey. Here are some of the questions we didn’t get to before they gave us the hook…


Readers of Lucy Vinis’s June 22 viewpoint may have thought the mayor was voicing support for the citizens’ initiative petition, filed in May, that would amend the Eugene City Charter to establish an Office of an Independent elected city auditor. But the mayor’s intent, in sync with city officials, is to undermine the citizens’ effort with their own self-serving version of an audit function.

Accountability and transparency are essential to democracy. As Eugene’s mayor, I invite you to explore with me the potential benefits of a performance auditor to improve the effectiveness of city government and build the community’s trust in our public process.

How tense is it in Salem right now?  The governor just hired a crack team of medical specialists called cranio-proctologists to investigate the alleged legislative leadership. There’s ample evidence that the state Capitol is about to explode. And with less than a few weeks until the July 10 sine die date for adjournment, something needed to be done.

I am a 34-year-old straight woman. I’m monogamous and have an avoidant attachment style. I’ve been seeing a guy I really like. He’s just my type, the kind of person I’ve been looking for my whole life. Thing is, he’s in an open relationship with someone he’s been with for most of his adult life. He was sneaky—he didn’t reveal he was in an open relationship until the second date, but by then I was infatuated and felt like I wasn’t in control of my actions.

 I visited the state Capitol last week to see the zombies in action. The hallways were empty, even the lobbyists weren’t around. So I did the practical thing and had a beer with my state senator, Floyd Frank Prochoiceski, and former senator Jackie Dingfelder. Floyd described the lack of communication among the members and their respective caucuses. Succinctly speaking, Salem sucks.

I’m almost 30 and I’m a virgin. I’m an overweight, straight-ish guy (I’m attracted to a few men, but those cases are exceedingly rare). I’ve also gone through an absolute hell life thus far, losing a testicle to cancer and having an abusive father who threatened a teenage me into celibacy by invoking the phrase “penile lobotomy” should I have sex with any girlfriends. I’ve barely dated in 10 years, and while I’m free from my father and the aforementioned mortal dick terror, I’m also INCREDIBLY scared about putting myself out there.

Here’s the deal: If you care about your community, you cannot afford to ignore economic development. 

Economic development is not a benign program implemented by well meaning people to create jobs. It is one of the prime game changers that determine the future of a community. We ignore it at our peril.  

Who could have imagined that when Barnum and Bailey closed their tents for good last month in New York that they would ship their leftover elephant effluvia and donkey dung to Oregon’s capitol! Circus Maximus! I say just send ’em all home and save the per diem.

I hate how my boyfriend has sex with me. He is 40 years old. It used to be fine, but a year ago he started adding new moves he obviously got from porn: smacking my pussy with an open palm, vigorously rubbing my clit, wrapping his hands around my neck. I’m not anti-porn; what bothers me is that even though I told him these moves don’t feel good on my body and hurt me, he doesn’t care. I’ve told him that it is painful when he slaps and manhandles my clit, and he responds that he likes it and I should feel happy that he still wants to fuck me six times a week.

The frenetic flowering rush of spring is tapering off as nature settles into the languorous days surrounding the summer solstice. The sun rises early, before most people wake up, and sunset punctuates a late evening. For two months, the change in day length varies by barely an hour.

Testing season is upon us — again. During April, May and June, students take weeks of Smarter Balanced Math and Language Arts tests. This is in addition to a year’s worth of other tests such as OAKS Science, EasyCBM, DIBELS (Dynamic Indicators of Basic Early Literacy Skills), STAMP (STAndards-based Measurement of Proficiency), EDL2 (Evaluación del desarrollo de la lectura), etc.

Many of us recognize the value of bicycling. It’s fun (especially under the sun), it’s good for the health of the cyclist and it’s good for the health of the planet that we’re all a part of.

We appreciate the organizations that promote cycling and all the awesome bike shops that sell and maintain the bikes we ride. Some of us are even aware of local businesses that design and build cycles, such as Co-Motion, Bike Friday and Human Powered Machines. But when thinking of cycling, how many of us think of it as something beyond a way to get from point A to point B?

I’m a middle-aged homo trying to figure out Grindr. Is it impolite to go on Grindr if you’re not looking for an immediate hookup? My preferred form of sexual relationship is the friend-with-benefits situation. I go on Grindr looking to make friends who could, at least potentially, be sex partners, but I like to do the friend thing before the sex. I’ve had guys call me an asshole because I exchanged messages with them for 20 minutes and then didn’t come right over and fuck them. Do they have a point?

The first time I ever smoked pot was two weeks out of high school at a rock festival in the Atchafalaya Basin about an hour north of New Orleans. June 21, 1971. The sun was just above the western horizon on a 105-degree day. A surfer dude convinced me to give it a try.