Are You Gay-Friendly?

Take the quiz and find out

Last month Oregon’s Senate Bill 2, the new law to protect gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Oregonians from discrimination, and House Bill 2007, recognizing domestic partnerships, were signed by our governor and set to take effect Jan. 1, 2008. But even before the ink dried — and with a ballpoint pen that’s pretty quick — the opposition launched its drive to put the new laws to a vote.

Now, our civil rights are on ice until the November ’08 general election. Then they’ll become law only if the no-on-equality vote fails.

Gauging from past anti-gay ballot measures around here, the lead-up to the elections won’t be pretty. Queer-hating rhetoric will get air time under the guise of political debate. All of the old nasty myths and stereotypes will be unleashed.

Make way for more tough times, especially for LGBTQ kids, who you know are going to hear a lot worse than That’s So Gay.

We fair-minded folks will need to know who’s on our side. During the tough political months ahead, we’ll be checking over our shoulder to see who’s got our backs. Can you be counted among the LGBTQ-friendly? Take the quiz!

 

1. When I meet lesbian, gay, bi, trans, queer or questioning (LGBTQ)people, I usually:

a. Tell them they’re an abomination against God

b. Try to act cool, but I can’t help wondering why they’re That Way

c. Shake their hands

2. I believe LGBTQ people are:

a. Morally degenerate

b. Kind of weird, but they can’t help it

c. Earthlings

3. Some of my best friends are:

a. Grieving for Jerry Falwell

b. Gay-acting

c. Not allowed to get married under Oregon law

4. Homosexuals are:

a. Sick

b. Sick, but they are good cooks

c. Sick and tired of harassment and discrimination

5. Most LGBTQ people want:

a. To take over our schools and teach immoral behavior to our children

b. To dress like the opposite sex

c. Equality

6. When someone tells a fag joke I usually:

a. Get an adrenaline rush and want to go out and smear a queer.

b. Laugh real loud so nobody thinks I’m gay.

c. Explain why the joke perpetuates harmful stereotypes and that most    

homophobes are insecure about their own sexuality.

7. My opinion about the ban on gays in the military is:

a. Keep the ban

b. Don’t ask, don’t tell

c. Ban the military

8. Oregon’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people should:

a. Repent

b. Keep it in the privacy of their own bedrooms

c. Be protected against discrimination, so I’m telling everyone not to sign the petitions against nondiscrimination and domestic partnerships, and log on to www.basicrights.org and pledge to vote YES for Equality in the 2008 election

 

How did you do?

Add one point for every “c” answer.

Add zero points for every “b” answer.

Subtract 10 points for every “a” answer and do 10 hours of community service.

Key:

7-8 points = Congratulations and thank you, you are LGBTQ-friendly!

5-7 points = Nice try, but I wouldn’t let you marry my sister.

< 5 points = Your eyelids are getting heavy, you will forget to vote in 2008.

Award-winning write Sally Sheklow has been agitating for equality in Eugene since nineteen-seventy-fucking-two.