Dinner For Schmucks: Paul Rudd is a successful executive who becomes even more successful when he finds the best idiot (Steve Carell) for his boss’s monthly dinner, at which their underlings compete to invite the most horrifying dinner guests. Directed by Jay Roach (Austin Powers). PG-13. Movies 12.
Good Fairy, The: William Wyler’s 1935 films stars Margaret Sullavan as a young woman just out of a nunnery. When a rich man expresses interest in her, she makes up a husband by picking a name from the phone book; it’s all very complicated, of course. 90 min. Screens as part of DIVA/LCC’s fall film seminar, which focuses on movies from the ’30s. 7 pm Tuesday, Sept. 28, at DIVA. $3.
I’m Still Here: Casey Affleck finally came right out and said that his “documentary” about Joaquin Phoenix’s attempt to transition from being an actor to being a rapper is, well, no such thing. Does that make it more or less intriguing? R. 108 min. Bijou.
Jamaica For Sale: Documentary examines the environmental, social and economic effects of tourism in a country highly dependent on the tourist industry. Screening includes discussion with filmmaker Esther Figueroa and commentary by scholar Maxine Burkett. 7 pm Monday, Sept. 27, 110 Knight Law, UO.
Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole: Zack Snyder — yes, the Watchmen and 300 guy — directs this movie based on Kathryn Lasky’s series of books about a young owl named Soren and his quest to find the legendary Guardians of Ga’Hoole — and save his world from the evil Pure Ones. With the voices of Sam Neill, Geoffrey Rush, Hugo Weaving and David Wenham. PG. 90 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15.
Robin Hood: He is an OUTLAW! Did you know that? I bet you did. Ridley Scott directs a serious-business version of the old tale — so, it’s an origin story, right? Isn’t Russell Crowe a bit old for an origin story? Whatever. At least Cate Blanchett is in it. PG-13. 148 frickin’ minutes. David Minor Theater.
Virginity Hit, The: Four dudes chronicle the epic adventure that is getting laid. “A thoroughly depressing teen farce in which Internet voyeurism has replaced human intimacy and where privacy is ‘so’ 20th century,” says The Boston Globe. R. 86 min. VRC Stadium 15.
Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps: Michael Douglas reprises his role as Gordon Gekko, who’s just out of prison and back playing the money game. Shia LaBeouf is the young trader who teams up with Gekko; Carey Mulligan is Gekko’s estranged daughter, and, naturally, LaBeouf’s love interest. Oliver Stone directs. PG-13. 127 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15.
Wild Grass: A woman’s purse is stolen. A man finds her wallet. A connection is formed. Or at least, that’s what director Alain Resnais suggests, but it’s hard to find much to connect with in this baffling film, full of primary colors, swaying grass and the best French actors around. With Mathieu Almaric, Anne Consigny, Andre Dussollier and Emmanuelle Devos. “Many will be transported by its gorgeous construction and breathless emotion. Others will find it patently ridiculous,” says the New York Daily News. PG. 104 min. Bijou.
You Again: Kristen Bell is a successful career woman virtually undone by the news that her brother is marrying her old high school rival. Wait, seriously? There must be more to this film, or KBell, Sigourney Weaver and Jamie Lee Curtis wouldn’t be in it. Right? PG. 105 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15.
Alpha & Omega: In this animated tale, Hayden Panetierre and Justin Long voice Kate and Humphrey, two wolves who are trying to find their way home after being nabbed by park rangers. PG. 88 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15.
American, The: George Clooney is an assassin holed up in Italy, where he befriends a priest and has a “torrid liaison” with a gorgeous woman. Critics are divided on Anton Corbijn’s follow-up to the Joy Division biopic Control; the New York Times says “The American is never less than gorgeous.” R. 105 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15. (9/9)
Cats and Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore: Rogue cat spy Kitty Galore (get it? Huh, do ya?) plans to take down the world’s dogs AND make her feline fellows her subordinates. Puppers and kittehs must unite against her! You, audiences, must unite in avoiding this film! PG. 82 min. Movies 12.
Date Night: Tina Fey and Steve Carrell are a totally ordinary couple whose date night runs out of control when they steal a table at a fancy restaurant. With James Franco and Mila Kunis as the couple whose table it was, and Mark Wahlberg as a dude who doesn’t wear a lot of shirts. PG13. David Minor Theater. (4/15)
Devil: M. Night Shyamalan produced this shiny thriller about a group of people stuck in an elevator — one of whom may be — shock! horror! — the devil. PG-13. 80 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15.
Easy A: The charming Emma Stone (Superbad, Zombieland) stars as a teen who gets a new rep when she agrees to fib about getting busy with a classmate. The rumor mill has a field day, and then things get really complicated. Sweet but shallow, Easy A is fun while you’re watching but leaves an odd aftertaste. Stanley Tucci and Patricia Clarkson, however, are charming as our heroine’s kooky parents. PG-13. 92 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15. See review this issue.
Eat Pray Love: Julia Roberts stars in the adaptation of Elizabeth Gilbert’s bestselling memoir about traveling the world to find herself after an unpleasant divorce. PG-13. 133 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15.
Eclipse: The Twilight saga continues with the cinematic adaptation of the least annoying of the four books (still looking forward to some of the batshit crazy stuff in book four, though…) Bella (Kristen Stewart) and Edward (Robert Pattinson) get serious, while werewolf Jacob (Taylor Lautner) gets more serious about butting in — and baby vampires terrorize Seattle. Yes, it’s all absurd. PG-13. 124 min. Cinemark. Movies 12. VRC Stadium 15. (7/8)
Expendables, The: Yet another film about a group of mercenaries trying to accomplish something that would be totally impossible — for any other group of men. And make no mistake: This movie is a frickin’ sausage fest. With Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Mickey Rourke, Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li and Steve Austin. R. 103 min. Cinemark.
Get Low: Robert Duvall is superb as a small-town hermit — the kind all the kids are afraid of, and everyone knows a story about — who decides he wants to throw a funeral party for himself while he’s still alive. Bill Murray is the funeral parlor owner who sees potential in the plan; Sissy Spacek is a warm face from the hermit’s past. A gem for the performances, if a little too tidy a film. PG-13. 100 min. Bijou. (8/26)
Grown Ups: Look, there are stupid movies, and then there are full-on assaults on your intelligence. If you want to watch some comics who fear for their relevance make fart jokes and run into trees, be my guest. With Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, Kevin James and David Spade. PG-13. 102 min. Movies 12.
How to Train Your Dragon: This movie is 100 percent great. It’s about a young Viking (voiced by Jay Baruchel) who thinks he’d rather befriend dragons, his people’s longtime enemies, than kill them. Good call, kid. That’s a cute dragon you got there. PG. 98 min. Movies 12.
Inception: The latest from director Christopher Nolan (The Dark Knight, Memento) sweeps in on a building wave of expectation. It’s something to do with thieves stealing ideas from dreams. I think. I know it stars the stellar lineup of Leonardo DiCaprio, Ellen Page, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Marion Cotillard and Ken Watanabe. PG-13. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15. (7/22)
Karate Kid, The: Cranky kid Dre Parker (Jaden Smith) has a hard time adjusting to life in China — an impossible crush, a gaggle of bullies — until he befriends the maintenance man (Jackie Chan), who has a not-so-secret talent. PG. Movies 12.
Last Airbender, The: Apparently there’s even more wrong with M. Night Shyamalan’s latest than the casting snafu that infuriated fans of the TV show The Last Airbender: Airbender, the movie, stars white actors as characters that were Inuit or Asian in the series (see racebending.com for more). The story concerns conflict between four elemental nations, some members of which can control fire, water, air or earth. Ebert called it “an agonizing experience.” Fair warning, that. PG. Movies 12.
Machete: Robert Rodriguez turns what was once just a fake trailer into a violent, funny, deliciously over-the-top film about an ex-Federale (Danny Trejo) caught up in the machinations of a greedy senator’s aide, an immigration agent and a Mexican drug lord. Shit blows up good. Lindsay Lohan turns up in a nun’s habit. Michelle Rodriguez is even more badass than usual. This sucker delivers on its trailer. R. 105 min. Cinemark. (9/9)
Nanny McPhee Returns: Emma Thompson stars as the be-warted nanny, who moves from city to country with her charges during wartime. With Maggie Gyllenhaal and Rhys Ifans. PG. 100 min. Movies 12.
Other Guys, The: Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg are paper-pusher policemen who try to cop the style of their bad-ass, attention-grabbing colleagues (Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L. Jackson). Things go poorly. With Steve Coogan, Eva Mendes and Michael Keaton. 107 min. PG13. Cinemark.
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time: Prince of L.A.? Prince of Europe? Jake Gyllenhaal is offensively miscast as rogue prince (can you be both?) Dastan (DASTAN!) in this action flick based on the video game of the same name. Gemma Arterton (from that second rebooted James Bond movie that was so bad I can’t remember the name) co-stars as Princey-Poo’s love interest. They have this dagger thing. I’m sure it’s irrelevant. PG-13. Movies 12.
Ramona and Beezus: Adapting Beverly Cleary’s iconic books about Ramona and her big sister Beezus, and filming them somewhere that’s not Cleary’s Portland neighborhood? How could they? G. Movies 12.
Resident Evil: Afterlife: The latest in the videogame-based series finds Alice (Milla Jovovich) still trying to help survivors of the virus that turned most people into undead creatures. Rumor is L.A. is safe, but maybe not so much. (Hey, isn’t that the plot of Zombieland?) R. 90 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15.
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World: Michael Cera stars in Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead)’s adaptation of Brian Lee O’Malley’s charming comic book about a boy who has to defeat his new girlfriend’s seven evil exes. With Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Chris Evans, Brandon Routh, Anna Kendrick and many more perfectly cast twentysomethings. PG-13. 113 min. Movies 12. (8/19)
Soliltary Man: Michael Douglas stars as a man whose “indiscretions” mess up his personal and professional life. “A sharp, small-scale comedy of male misbehavior that turns out to be one of this dreary spring’s pleasant cinematic surprises,” said The New York Times. R. 90 min. David Minor Theater.
Sorcerer’s Apprentice, The: College kid Dave (the charming Jay Baruchel) finds himself swept into a battle between good and evil (I assume; these things always involve such battles) when a sorcerer (Nicolas Cage in a terrifying wig) crosses his path. PG. Movies 12.
Town, The: Ben Affleck’s second directorial effort is getting solid reviews; the film, based on a novel by Chuck Hogan, follows a group of Boston thieves, the FBI agent hoping to catch them, and the woman who might be able to turn them in. With Rebecca Hall, Jon Hamm, Jeremy Renner, Chris Cooper and Pete Postlethwaite. R. 124 min. Cinemark. VRC Stadium 15. See review this issue.
Vampires Suck: Yes, popular things are easy to spoof! Very little effort required! PG-13. 80 minutes and a lifetime of regret. Movies 12.
Bijou Art Cinemas
Bijou Theater 686-2458 | 492 E. 13th
David Minor Theater
David Minor Theater and Pub 762-1700 | 180 E. 5th
VRC Stadium 15 342-6536 | Valley River Center
Movies 12 741-1231 | Gateway Mall
Cinemark 17 741-1231 | Gateway Mall